Do the following to make your wife or girlfriend want to give you oral sex/blowjob:
1. State your love for her.
2. State your desire to have a great sex life with her.
3. Tell her you desire to have oral sex.
4. Ask her what her beliefs and fears are about oral sex.
5. Ask her to be specific.
6. Tell her you promise not to take it personally. (Remember, she’d feel that way about any lover, it’s not about YOU, it’s about her experiences, beliefs and fears. ) Be a man and handle the information without making it a negative about you or she won’t trust that she can tell you her truth and you will shut her down.
7. Put your full attention on her and sit with her and touch her while she’s telling you. Be very patient. Keep asking her, “What else? Is that all?”
8. Explain that you want to find a path to having her desire to suckle you and you will think about all she’s said.
9. Once you understand her objections, you can educate her, remove obstacles that block her, find compromises and do whatever would make her feel comfortable taking a very slow journey together to experiment with oral sex. Begin-as-beginners together and enjoy what ever small progress you both make. Gradually with little space of time, with her being comfortable with the whole idea of oral, while you are not being selfish, she will be okay with oral sex. When women are uneducated and inexperienced they are afraid of things. One of the secrets getting amazing oral sex from your partner is by exposure. Exposure in small amounts over time will alleviate her fear. You must ease into it. First, talk to her. Find out what she really thinks. Help her get in touch with her feelings by being supportive and wide open to what ever is true for her. Ask her questions like this:
1. What is holding you back from oral sex?
2. Is part of your holding back coming from something that happened in the past?
3. Is part of your holding back coming from feelings of not knowing what to do?
4. Is part of your holding back coming from things you’ve heard authority figures (spiritual leaders, community, family, friends) say that has made you afraid?
5. Is part of your holding back coming from a reaction to my body, to my penis, to my actions?
Just keep asking her these kinds of questions. It’s likely there are a number of reasons why she shies away from wanting to touch or suckle your penis.
When she answers, go deeper to get underneath her answer. For example, if she says she’s afraid to give you oral sex because her mother told her it was dirty, ask her if she holds the same views as her mother about sex and why she hasn’t made her own decisions about what’s right for her, instead of what she’s been told.
I’ll be she wants to have a sensual, sexually charged and positive relationship with you, even if her mother never had one with her father. Does she?
If so, are those beliefs she’s taken for granted holding her back from the intimacy she would like to have with you? Are her limiting beliefs not serving her?
What does she secretly believe as her true feelings, if she removes her mother’s opinion?
Deconstruct what she says further to get the best understanding of her beliefs.
Once you are both on the same page with regard to her beliefs, you’ll be able to work around, fix or compromise to support her needs and yours.
You won’t make any progress guessing. You’ll simply confuse the situation more.
Time for a heart to heart talk about not only oral sex, but your whole sex life with her.
You have one life to live together. Make it a transcendent, emotionally and spiritually uplifting experience of a true love bond for both of you.
You are the leader. Lead her to more sexual expression of the love you share.